Hello? Can you hear me?

Currently my guy and I live in a place where the rumour is that your home is wired for both audio and visual monitoring of your every move. It may be true; it may not be true. I don’t care. But odd things happen and you have to wonder as well as find the humour in it.

The other day we were happily unpacking our stuff (it was packed up one year ago and we now have it back!!) when lunchtime rolled around. Not being able to get to much but spying a frying pan and realizing the stovetop just happened to be free of clutter at the moment I declared we would have scrambled eggs for lunch. My guy looked down at his feet and sheepishly said “We are out of eggs, sorry.” My reply was “Great, how do we get through the next few days without eggs? The car is broken and the only place with eggs is too far to walk to.” I wasn’t mad at him, there was food in the house, and we were rather busy with all of the unpacking so forgetting about eggs was not truly a big deal. It was just annoying at the moment. We launched into a discussion of what we could slap together from the things we could reach in order to eat and still had not come to a conclusion about 20 minutes later. And that was when the doorbell rang. We hunted down the keys, unlocked the door and the grill and made our way to the gate. There stood two women with 2 flats of eggs. Now we have lived here for more than a few months and not a soul has ever come to the door offering to sell anything. But as soon as I complained about the lack of something, and did so out loud, lo-and-behold it appears at the door. We bought both flats of eggs (60 eggs altogether and yes we will use every last one of them). After getting them all put away I looked at the ceiling and said “Thanks. I need chicken and pork too.” We both laughed and went back to unpacking.

The next morning we were trying to put stuff away, decide what to do with the packing materials, and just generally get the house in order. The doorbell rings, startling the heck out of us because everyone who knows us (ok, knows me) knows to leave us alone while we get this job done. But you may be sensing a pattern here. You would be right. After doing the unlocking business again we discover a man selling chicken, pork, and all types of fish. Hey – isn’t that exactly what we needed? We bargain for some of everything and he disappears for 30 minutes or so. When he returns he has tuna, chicken, pork, and lobster – all fresh. The slaughter in the kitchen begins. I make a graceful exit (if you can call gagging and whining “Ewwwww” a graceful exit – I do) to the other room. A few hours later the freezer is stuffed with food for the next three months, the kitchen is clean, and I begin planning dinner parties.

A “cookie lady” showed up today. I wasn’t supposed to be home, it is Thursday after all and work is the usual routine. But workmen needed access to the house and I was elected to stay home. Somehow (hmmm…… we were talking about this last night and were wondering about things like sweet and savory empanadas) she knew I would be here and just showed up with 24 sweet, jelly filled, fresh-from-the-oven empanadas. Yes, I bought them. All of them. What? Like you wouldn’t? Please. Fresh cookies? Who are we kidding here?

It seems as though I now have “people” that come and sell me food – right at my front door. And that they can, umm, read my mind. So, is someone listening in? I don’t know and I don’t care. But, just in case, - I am out of butter. Hello?? Can you hear me????