A Weird, But Informative, Conversation

Have you ever wondered about the battle techniques of African tribesmen? Me neither. But I can now share a couple of interesting (or is that just plain odd) tidbits about those techniques. The conversation started with a discussion of the brightly coloured lizards that roam around everywhere here. They bob their heads up and down and do what appear to be push-ups when you get near them. It seems that is how the male lizards challenge intruders to their space and, as they consider everywhere their territory, we are invaders on a regular basis and so get the bob and push-up battle challenge every day. Someone then mentioned that men have some strange battle habits themselves and reminded us all of the Scots who in ancient times stripped down, painted themselves blue and tied ribbons on, um, a particular appendage. At least, he thought it was the Scots; maybe it was the Vikings because weren’t they called berserkers for getting all riled up with battle rage and foaming at the mouth? This prompted someone else to volunteer two facts about tribal warriors here in Africa. Warriors take juju bags into battle. Filled (with things I’d rather not know about) and blessed by the witch doctor and worn around the neck, these juju bags are supposed render the wearer impervious to bullets. The witch doctor rouses the warriors into a frenzy, hands out the juju and off they go to glory and victory in battle. Of course, if it doesn’t work out then it was obvious that the warrior (or warriors) did not have a strong enough faith. As we all thought about that, someone piped up with “Did you know some tribes wear dresses into battle?” It turns out that some African tribes do actually put on women’s clothing before fighting begins. Not only that but some do the full on drag queen treatment. Dress, wigs, make-up and then off to battle. Could this be to confound the enemy? Can you imagine your own reaction as a tribe of screaming drag queens come running towards you, spears high, shields waving? Or what it would look like as two tribes faced each other? Shouldn’t this be the subject of a National Geographic documentary?

Hasn’t this been educational? What to do with this information from a weird conversation is debatable but it sure will make you the hit of the next boring cocktail party you attend!